Make a Memory

November 27, 2013

You want to make a memory ? Well, interestingly enough, we have already shared so many. Some of the moments, I remember – some of the moments, you remember  Isn’t it funny how memories work?

Recently someone was recanting a memory of my son, something from about 20 years ago and something that I have absolutely no memory of, but is so burned into their minds, as if it was yesterday. Just a tiny moment, a tiny snippet of time that really has no meaning, other than the fact that it seems to live in their minds so brilliantly. How could I have forgotten that shining moment? Or was it not my moment to remember? Was it not my moment at all…?

A couple of years ago someone I had known in school that happened to be at the same party I was at, told me his impression of me all those years ago. It took my breath away and I started to giggle out of nervousness. He seemed a bit hurt and asked me if I thought it was funny. All I could think was – of course not! It’s just that it never occurred to me that someone would have this fantasy about me – this completely unreachable height that I don’t think I could ever reach. At the very same time I felt empowered and young and thinking that possibly…I just might be able to reach that pre-determined height.

A month ago, I stopped by my parents’ home to see an old friend of theirs who I had always called “Uncle Rod.” He has been a regular guest in our home while I was growing up  and the moment that has stuck with me forever – really, to this day – is something simple. He showed me the old magic trick of taking off half of your thumb. I was probably 4 at the time and all I remember is that in that moment – he took my breath away with magic. I recanted the story to him and he seemed so surprised – it had been something so simple…but it is something that I will never forget – because it wasn’t the trick – it was the magic. And I can’t help it – that  moment will last until the end of time…that’s what magic does.

My parents recently celebrated 60 years of marriage. They are still so desperately in love – as if they were still the 25 year old bride and groom…and I am sure (having been married for 25 years myself) that there were just as many lows as there were highs. It is a long journey, and I think the secret of their success was that while they always trusted each other 100% – they were always aware of the fabulous value of each other….aware of the moments, both brilliant –  and perhaps not so brilliant.

I think we forget to tell the people who matter to us – about the moments that they have given us. They don’t have to be Big Huge Moments…but just magic moments,things that we can’t help but remember forever.

When my husband and I were first dating, we were standing on the balcony of my apartment – the moon was beautiful and full. I gestured the sky and said to him,  “look at that man in the moon – he is looking right down on us.” My husband  looked confused. He said he had never been able to make out the face of the man in the moon – so I pointed it out to him.

Then I kissed him and told him that I would be with him forever… because no matter what happened in our lives, he would never be able to look at the moon again without seeing that man…..and me.

Tell someone that you care about, some small thing that they brought into your life. Make their moment.

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