June 21, 2013

Wow. Sometimes I think that turning fifty really starts to put you close to the edge. Today, I had one of my most ridiculous  moments. Last night, I noticed a reddish-brown mark on my forehead, kind of like a large freckle. It hadn’t been there at dinner but I didn’t panic, just thought that maybe it was just a weird mark from falling asleep on my ring or something, during my pre-bedtime nap.

This morning it seemed larger or at the very least, browner – definitely like a large freckle or mole. Could it be just that? Do these things just pop up suddenly? I ask my daughter to look at it – she agrees, it definitely looks like a mole. Now, my heart is beginning to beat a bit erratically. I get the magnifying glass (plus my reading glasses, of course) and check it out. Oh yeah – this thing is brownish…I try to decide whether it looks like a freckle, a mole or an age spot…and seriously – do these things just  pop out?!

I keep examining it to see it the edges are irregular – you know, like the they tell you to check, in case – God forbid – it’s melanoma. Oh my, oh my! All I can think is that, in my job I am out in the sun for a good portion of the  day – but I use sunscreen…I REALLY do! Do I put enough on – do I skip a day here and there?

I tun my computer on – you know where I’m going now…the Internet. The internet will know for sure what this is  – right? Can’t call my doctor – she is away on holidays…can’t go to a clinic…this is a specialized situation…isn’t it? I tell my daughter that I’m a tad worried…I repeat out loud that I use sunscreen, I use sunscreen, I swear I use sunscreen! Well, most of the time…. damn – that’ll teach me!

I have to leave for work – so at this point all I can do is is grab the sunscreen and slather it on nice and thick…..I mean really, what else can I do?

I look in the mirror again and…lo and behold….the spot is gone It rubbed off with the sunscreen cream. As a teacher of preschoolers I remember that the supposedly washable paint we use is not always so washable. It was only a teeny smattering of paint that somehow escaped the spray of the shower. I am torn between sighing with relief and feeling like an idiot.


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