Who am I – “The Rock”?!

February 4, 2011

Day after the snowstorm and I need groceries badly – Mother Hubbard’s cupboard is bare. There is a grapefruit and a couple jars of salsa in the fridge and though I pride myself as a good cook – I’m finding it impossible to come up with a recipe for that one. So, off I go – braving the poorly cleared and slippery streets. I have to do one those mammoth orders because I’ve left it too long so I am pushing the cart and using my foot to both steady and steer it. I get to the checkout and the sweetest lady runs my things through – her trusty packer at her side. He’s a lovely older gent who generally packs my food quite expertly (you know – no bread in with cans and bottles). My wallet whines as I empty it  and then, foot at the ready, muscles flexed,  I steer my cart out of the store. Oooooh – it’s greasy in the lot as it hasn’t been cleared recently – plus there’s a bit of ice and a nice hefty winter wind blowing…but still, I manage. As I’m struggling to get down the aisle where my car is parked a van inches up my butt, giving me no room to push my cart….I see a woman behind the wheel and my blood pressure starts to rise…could she not wait a second or two for me to get across the lane? I mean it is so obvious that I’m struggling with my cart…Come on, Motor Mama – we’re here for the same reason! But no, she can’t wait and she whizzes by me, almost clipping my read end (not that I wouldn’t be happy to lose another inch or two off it)  and now I’m fuming – I want to kick her butt until it sits like a beret on her head – but alas, I don’t have heels on today. Nest best thing? I’m going to say something to her – well, I would have, if I weren’t carrying that extra bag in my teeth (hey – you know how precious that loaf of bread is!). All I’m left with is “the mother look” that I can shoot her…but then again, seeing as she is driving a van and at a super, super market, she is most likely a mother – and so, therefore, impervious to the mother look…(you know, she’s got the mom shield too…).

All right – screw her….or rather, ummm  – take the high road and I just start to load the groceries into the back of my vehicle and get home. I pull the bag with the bread in it out of my mouth – that’s an easy one. Next comes the bag with the veggies…so delightfully packed! Then –  I’m hit with the rest of the bags… 4 large cartons of milk plus a couple of cans – heavy! Next bag, 4 more cartons of milk  (hey – I have three kids) and 4 more cans…I can barely lift the rest of these overly packed bags – couldn’t that packer man have used ALL my bags instead of loading these few to capacity? I’m using both hand and putting my back into it……who did he think I was? The Rock?

Well – I suppose on the bright side – I got my work-out!


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